A Bong's Kitchen

It's often seen that as time goes by, marriages and relationships tend to lose their initial spark. The romance that was present during the initial phases of love gradually diminishes and sometimes it makes one feel like she is being taken for granted by her partner. This happens because after we fall into a routine and reach a level of ease in our relationship, we subconsciously start to care a little less about putting in enough efforts to keep the relationship exciting or to make our beloved feel special, though we continue to love our partner as much as before. It's just that we somehow stop expressing our love as often. That is why open communication with your partner is very essential to make your relationship work. Each partner should make efforts to reignite the lost zing in their relationship, if he or she feels that things aren't going as smooth as earlier. Of course after a phase, since people get busy with their other priorities and obligations, so as a result they aren't able to devote enough time to their beloved. They no longer try to please or impress their partner as they used to do during the honeymoon phase. This is when cracks may start to develop in the relationship and the person with unrequited love may feel betrayed, especially women, who look for emotional connection with their partners more than anything else. If a girl feels like her husband isn't loving her anymore the way he used to do earlier, she becomes depressed. She loses confidence in herself thinking that her husband doesn't find her attractive any more and so doesn't love her anymore. Such negative thoughts had entered my mind too.

I had an arranged marriage with my husband Arindom. He is diametrically opposite to me, as far as our character traits are concerned. While I am an extrovert and an expressive person, my husband is a silent type who often keeps his emotions to himself. While I am a die-hard romantic who loves to be wooed, he is as unromantic a person as one could be. However I have always loved his simplicity and his child-like heart and he does care about me and loves me a lot, even though he rarely expresses his feelings for me. We women expect our men to do the little things every now and then to show that we are special to them and that is exactly what Arindom rarely does. Initially I had loved his romantic naivety but gradually when he started to remain busy with his office work and so wasn't giving me enough time, his unromantic ways made me irritated, it made me lose confidence in myself. Then came a phase when it seemed like we were only going through the motions of living together. The energy and the romance that once coloured our relationship had gone out of the window altogether.

That is when, out of the blue, Arindom surprised me on the day of our marriage anniversary. Not only did he remember the date but he also took the day off from his work to spend the day with me. We didn't have any lavish party nor did he give me an expensive gift, any necklace or any saree but he surely won my heart  once again with his simple gestures that proved that he still loved me as much as ever. It was a day full of surprises. The first surprise was that he had left me a note under my pillow in the morning that read, "I don't say it often but I hope you know that I love you with all my heart and I want you to keep loving me the way you do". I couldn't believe that Arindom could write me such a message, I could only blush and smile. The next surprise was that he had already prepared the breakfast for the day by the time I got into the kitchen -- some burnt rotis :P and alu chorchori. Prior to this day, he had probably never entered the kitchen, at least never to cook. He knew nothing about cooking but on our special day, he wanted to make me feel special, he wanted to spare me of the kitchen chores and so he took it upon himself to do the cooking. He had asked a friend of his to teach him a few cooking steps and also some easy Bengali recipes. Never mind the burnt rotis but he had surely put in the effort and it showed in the way his alu chorchori tasted. That made me so emotional that I couldn't hold back my tears. He was even insisting on preparing the lunch but I didn't want to take chance, hehehe. So we went out to a Chinese restaurant for lunch, which was then followed by a movie. After the movie, we then went to the India Gate and spent the evening there doing some boating and taking strolls across the lawn. We also ate gup chup and alu tiki from the street vendors there and so also the ice-lollies. We then sat down near the water-fountain and enjoyed watching the cascading water fall down to match the music. But all along he mostly remained silent. Even as we were coming back home, he hardly spoke much on the way but I still felt so nice resting my head on his shoulders as he gently held me close. It was indeed a delightful evening, one that i would never forget.

When you love someone dearly, the place or the setting doesn't really matter, what matters is the togetherness, the companionship of your beloved. That he was present with me all day, both physically as well as emotionally, is what made the day special for me. He didn't do anything extraordinary for me that day and yet with his simple gestures, he made me feel special. That is love. When someone's feelings are sincere, they needn't do anything grand to make you feel special. It's their company that does, it's the feeling of togetherness that matters.

P.S. - This is about the power of #Togetherness, it's the company of a loved one that matters more than anything, and this is courtesy https://housing.com/.